Wednesday, September 21, 2011

29 years in review

Today is my birthday...  My last birthday before I turn the big 30.  I can say that I have had my ups and downs and life has been cruel to me sometimes, but it has made me the person I am.

29 years ago my Mom gave birth to her only child.  Dad wanted a boy but was happy with what he got.  Everyone thinks since I was an only child I was spoiled but my parents worked hard for what little money they got and my life long hobby was started with ponies.  My Mom begged and borrowed and I always had a free lease pony to ride.  I showed and showed and got involved with USPC and moved thru the ranks.  Dad was happy that his young girl worked hard and was more of a tom boy because she wasn't afraid to get dirty. 

My Dad and uncle had a pulling tractor and I was always at the pulls with them.  I did the horses with my Mother and the Pulls with my Father.  I wish I knew then what I know now, that those late nights in the shop and at the pulls would be some of the best memories with my Dad.

I was a pretty good kid, didn't get in trouble, always had a job and worked hard.  I didn't play sports in school because I had the horses at home.  Most kids would be out late on Friday nights, I was home getting the horses bathed and ready for a show or rally the next day.  My summer vacation was to USPC championships and my parents took their time off from work to take me there. 

I had lost most of my grandparents when I was young so they didn't get to see all my accomplishments.  Hell my only grandfather living didn't even come to my wedding. 

At 19, I got married.  Thought everything was great. Married for 3 years then he wanted a divorce.  I left and went back home.  I was bitter and angry.  I survived and found out that I could still have fun, I was young.

At 21, my Dad was first diagnosed with cancer.  He was such a strong man and I thought he would be there for me forever.  I went with him to a lot of his appointments and chemo treatments.  I was always very close with my Dad. 

At 23, I lost my Dad.  I don't think I have fully grieved for him yet.  It's been 4.5 years since he has died.  I had to be strong for my Mom.  I made all his arrangements and took care of everything.  My boyfriend at the time and I moved in to stay with my Mom.  I changed rolls from being the daughter and became the Mother.  Eventually things did not work out between all three of us and we all went our seperate ways.

At 26, I met one of the greatest guys I know.  We started dating and everything just clicked.  There is no fighting, getting mad, storming off.  We have a great relationship and he supports me in everything I want to do.  I love this boy with all of my heart.  We are still searching for a place to buy but hopefully soon we will find something.

Now if only my body will keep up.  I have had some weird shit happen to me over the years.  I have learned how to deal with everything and keep going. 

List of things I have had or have: 
Bells Palsy
Hidradenitis Suppurativa
Pseudotumor Cerebri
Latest things to add:  two bulging discs in my lower back and my neck has two reverse curvatures that we are treating with traction.  Had not been a good two weeks for my spine.

Most days I feel old but I try to make the best of them.  I don't know what this next year will bring but I hope it treats me well and I make the most of it.  So tonight I am celebrating my last birthday ever (lol) with good food and great friends and the love of my life.

1 comment:

HunterRider4eva said...

hey happy belated birthday! mine was the 5th sept(turned 29 also).
sorr about your dad.hugs to you ,glad to hear that you are doing better with life situation)relationship,family etc)..also nice to hear there is someone who worked hard in her riding and grew up with lease/free ride ponies too and not afraid to get
you sounded like me in some spots.
by the way thanx for becoming a follower to my blog. keep up on the good work on your blog,enjoyed reading it.